Oh, Technology

My apologies about the previous post and only half of the pictures actually showing up. I won’t go into the amount of time it actually took for the pictures to load or how they magically changed their own properties to go from jpeg to text/html…or the amount of frustration (and resulting vocabulary) that ensued. Suffice it to say there really are pictures and we really are trying to get them to show up. In the mean time…enjoy the circus pictures!

 

No Ticket…

So, to sum up, we’re home.  Thank you all for reading, your comments, and …oh, I’m summing before actually telling you.  Well, it cuts down on the reading if you don’t like my quips and longwindednessessess.

For the rest of you lucky people, we really weren’t planning to leave on Tuesday.  Because we couldn’t get the paperwork in to the embassy until Friday, we weren’t going to be able to get a Visa until Tuesday afternoon (after the only flight left).  Monday wasn’t an option because even if you’re in a different country, MLK is a federal holiday.  So, no Monday, no Tuesday, and no flights on Wednesday put us on a course for Thursday afternoon.

Jane, I think “sensed” that I was restless (if by sensed, I mean, “the level of frustration and clinical depression was so transparent a deaf and blind person could tell I wanted to go home”).  She suggested that we try to get our paperwork in on Friday, beg and plead to get the Visa interview and paperwork done early Tuesday morning, and do a Lightning McQueen to the airport to catch the flight. (YES, I’m recapping from the last post!  You chose to keep reading…I warned you!)

So, early Tuesday morning (6:00 am Kiev time, 11:00 pm Monday night EST) we got up, got out, and got to the embassy.  We were greeted by a throng (yes, I said throng) of people waiting outside the embassy.  I thought we were sunk.  But, like Moses, our US Passports parted the crowds and moved us to the front of the line and into the embassy before anyone else (membership has its privileges).  I have to admit that after two months straight of following Ukrainian ways and culture, it felt great to just push our way to the door and watch the envious eyes of all the Ukrainians  throw daggers at us  (judge me when you’ve spent two winter months in Kiev).

We got in and out in a little over an hour.  We had so much time that I got to enjoy one last trip to McDonald’s (literally, my LAST trip to McDonald’s), get checked in, spend an hour with Jane, Barbara, and Vera (Ryan’s guardian before the adoption), go through security, and wait 2 hours to board.  

Yeah, the flight was late because de-icing in New York took longer than they anticipated, so we left about an hour and a half  later.  I still wasn’t sure I was going to get to leave though.  I felt like Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade.  I was waiting for the German Officer to come running out going, “Vait, vait!!” (now you get the title?  You know…he beats up the officer and throws him out the window…no ticket…you…know…psh!)

When the flight took off, my shoulders slumped as the tension ran out of my body.  We had done it!  No matter what now, my next destination was English speaking, capitalist loving, (yes my liberal buddies, right now, I love free market capitalism and all the natural gas, hot water, and customer service that it affords and entails.), newly elected President (yes my conservative buddies, I’m a flaming liberal that loves the fact that President, say it with me, President Obama won the election), United States of America.  I knew that even if I got stuck in New York, I could get a hotel room, a taxi, and some food without having to look at the person behind the counter with a “deer in headlights” stare. (unless their accent was really heavy…”youz wanna room o wha?” – Sorry New York people, your JFK passport officers could learn some manners with a 14 year old who can’t understand English).

Fortunately, that wasn’t an issue.  We had plenty of time to get through passport control (even through a computer glitch and the aforementioned officer), get our bags rechecked, buy a Dunkin Donuts coffee (oh sweet heavenly nectar), and wait an hour for our flight home.

When we arrived we were greeted by my mom and dad (holding a “Welcome Home Ryan” sign…they are awesome), my dad-in-law Doc, and the woman I had been dreaming about for over two weeks (no, not her!  Mary ya dummy!)  We all enjoyed a ride home, a little conversation about the trip, and a well-deserved rest.

So there you have it.  To sum up, we’re home!  Oh wait, I already said that.  Thanks for all the encouragement and prayers over the past two weeks.  It has been a long time since I felt this close to God and I know that is in part due to your commitment to this adoption.  Your love was known and felt by everyone (Galya, Jane, Barbara, Mary, Ryan, and I).

Like I said when we started this blog, this is an end to a beginning.  A whole new story is being written and I hope to continue to share it here as well as with each of you personally.  I’m sure that after he masters more of the English language and a touch of shyness that Ryan will want to meet and talk with all of you.  Until such time, don’t lose track of us, don’t stop praying, and give us a call.  We could use some time with friends and family.

Signing off for the last time as disgruntled and harried Ukrainian reporter.  Signing on soon as Dad.

 

Dragging My Dead Carcass Across The Finish

Hey everybody, GOOD NEWS! We have Ryan’s passport!…Ryan…you know, the boy from Ukraine, 14 years old, spent the year trying to adopt…Ryan!  Jeez people, where have you all been?  OH, yeah that’s right, haven’t told you all about the name change.

See, a few weeks ago (you know, when we thought we’d leave at the beginning of January instead of the end) we talked with Fedya about his name.  We said that his full name (pronounced in English as Feyoder) was difficult to say in America.  We decided to keep the shortened name Fedya as his first name, Ryan (a name Mary and I decided on) as his middle to give him an American name, and BellyDome for his last name (only people who speak Russian will find that funny…the rest of you, his last name is Whitehouse).

Now, when Mary left, we assumed he wanted to be called Fedya as it has been his name for the last 14 years.  However, another couple came to visit two boys they were adopting and had decided to change their names to American names completely.  It’s speculation on Halya’s, Jane’s, and my part that he decided to be called by his middle name after talking with these two boys.  But, in no uncertain terms, Fedya looked up at me when I asked him what he would like to be called in the States and said, “Ryan.”

To my friend Ryan, sorry.  You no longer are the cutest Ryan in North Carolina.  I’d venture to say that Elly would think so too.

To everyone who’s been to The Ark and has met and been with Fedya before, start practicing!  I know it’s going to be hard, but start working that name into your repertoire.

<continued from this morning>  So I had to stop on the paragraph above because we needed to leave for Ryan’s physical.  We were late getting there because they changed the name of the street and we didn’t have a new map.  Unfortunately, no one had Tom-Tom or Garmin or even VZ Navigator, so we had to get directions.

The process was faster than any of the previous (only 6 hours) but still had some minor complications.  There were a few vaccinations that were required for children 10 and older, so we had to get those.  Plus, every person, regardless of age, has to have a syphillis and HIV test, which we didn’t have record of.  So, we had to get those done and wait for the results until 2:00pm.

Unfortunately, the US Embassy was only taking documents until 12:00pm.  So, we were in quite the pickle when we arrived at 4:00pm to submit our paperwork.  Folks…let me take a minute here…the lady…I’m still in shock…took our paperwork…

No no, I don’t think you understand…she took our paperwork four hours after the deadline.  Still don’t get it?  Let me put it this way.  If we were submitting paperwork for any other part of this and we were 5 minutes late, the person was either already gone or laughed in our face…no, literally laughed in our face.  People, I was ready to kiss this woman through the plexi-glass window I was so happy! (Mary, you know what I mean).

Not only did she let us submit the paperwork but she went over it with me and made sure everything was correct.  Ok, this is lost on 99% of you, but Mary understands!  If there was anything out of place (even things that weren’t out of place) on other documents, we were sent home, to another office, or outside to come back the next business day.

OK, so maybe you won’t truly comprehend the simple delight I had in someone accepting my paperwork.  However, you will appreciate that after a short interview early on Tuesday morning (embassy is closed on Monday thanks to MLK…ironic, the man who stood for freedom is keeping me locked up in another country), a Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride to the airport, and Ryan and I will be on our way home.

So break out the blueberry muffins and the large coffee cause I…AM…COMING…HOME.  And, in a moment of giddy apprehension, I’m bringing my son.

 

Our video

Check it out.  This is a video we had done while we were here.  Fedya and Mary are great…I’m a big cheese ball.

As for an update, we’re closer.  Still moving at snail pace but closer.

 

So Cold Your Snot Freezes to Your Nosehair

I thought that would get your attention.  It’s Al again (aren’t you so happy?!?!).  I woke up this morning to 0 degree weather.  Now, I hear you saying, “wuss!  that’s 30 degree weather!  We’ve had worse!”  Let me clarify…0…degrees…Fahrenheit.  Yeah, your snot’d freeze to your nosehair too!

I am now the only field reporter from the Whitehouse clan.  Mary left yesterday around 1:00 pm (6:00 am est) and safely arrived in Apex around 11pm est.  I haven’t heard anything about her flight because of…well, let me put it in her words:

“Hi…I’m home.

I’ll tell you about the plane rides later…because right now it’s almost 11:00 and what I really want to do is get in bed. Instead, I’m at Dad’s house using his internet because my computer will connect to the network, but it won’t really connect. And the police are currently on the way to our house because something happened with the alarm…your dad is on the phone with mine. ANYWAY…my computer won’t connect so I…am now going to our house to meet the cops…be back in a minute.

Now I’m back. I’m sure I’ll sleep well tonight after watching 2 Apex police go through our house guns drawn to clear it and make sure no one was there. Apparently Dad didn’t shut the door completely when we left to come to his house to use his computer…long story about how that happened and I don’t feel like typing that much. The bottom line is that my computer WON’T. FREAKING. CONNECT. What do I do?

Oh and Verizon hasn’t turned our phones back on. I’m standing in the airport trying to call Dad and I hear “We’re sorry. Your call cannot be completed. To speak with a Verizon Representative, hang up and dial *611.” So I hang up and dial *611. And I get “We’re sorry. Your call cannot be completed. To speak with a Verizon Representative, hang up and dial *611.” So I’m also trying to get in touch with Verizon tonight to make sure I actually have a phone.

All I want to do is sleep. At least I figured out how to open the fuse box to turn on the hot water.”

To add to the trouble, Verizon wouldn’t reconnect her because they needed my authorization (am I a controlling husband or what?).  I had a nice talk with the Verizon techs and made sure she and I BOTH were reconnected and were authorized to make changes to the account.  The tech also offered to make a test call to make sure the phone was working…at 3a.m. est.  Anyone want to call a person who’s been traveling in cattle class for 17 hours after getting 4 hours of sleep?  I respectfully declined and said I would call her when the time was more appropriate.

To add to our excitement, after Mary left we received a call from Halya, our coordinator, to tell us that the alleycat…I mean, advocate was trying to get our court order today because he was leaving for vacation and wouldn’t be here on the 8th to get it for us (which would delay it till the 12th).  Needless to say, Jane and I rocketed to the court house to meet with the lawyer.

We had a 10 minute wait while the clerk stamped and verified the court order.  The lawyer decided to spark up a conversation with Jane and I which enlightened me to his character.  He asked, “Why are you going to complicate your life with a 14 year old boy?  You already have a wife to take care of, now you’re going to add a boy who needs special care and teaching and food.  You could have been happy!”

Take a minute to digest those statements.  Get past the shock of him saying this when we’re minutes away from officially being Fedya’s parents.  What does it say to you about his views on family, personal freedom, the life of a stranger?  All of yesterday I pitied the man.  I couldn’t believe that he could be so wrapped up in his own life not to see the joy in loving others.  It helped me to understand all of what he had said to us, all of what he had done.  I could spend a whole post about that conversation.  Instead, I’ll just tell you my response, “I can’t be happy without him.”

So, with an awkward silence, a few minutes passed and we got the court documents.  SO…drumroll please…Mary and I are OFFICIALLY parents now!  HURRAY!

Now I just need to get his new birth certificate, passport, physical, and US Visa…and we’re off!  Pray for me as my compass has left the country.  I will get all sappy and say that I am lost without Mary and I can’t imagine doing any of this without her.  Give her a call (AT A DECENT HOUR…SHE’S JETLAGGED) and wish her a welcome home!

Till next time, this is Al Whitehouse reporting live from Kiev where if the frostbite doesn’t get you, Nika’s gas will.

Peace and Love

 

Happy New Year

Before I really get into this, I should mention something about the court date. Yes, we had one…on Christmas Eve. And yes, we were approved. After that came a 10-day waiting period,which is up tomorrow. Unfortunately, government offices are closed until January 8 for the holidays. So we can’t get our court decree until then. After that, Al and Fedya will run around Kyiv finishing up paperwork and getting ready to come home. I head home on Monday.

Now about New Year’s. As promised, we have pictures. LOTS of pictures. Pictures of gingerbread houses, and pictures of the New Year’s Eve party with all the children. The gingerbread houses were built between breakfast and lunch. All the children came over and were soo excited to begin. Most of the children had never done this before, but they’d heard about it from the other children and were just as excited. The adults spread out to help make sure houses were structurally sound enough to withstand the roof and lots of decorations…and then it was time to pass out the candy. For the most part, all houses came out really well. A few needed some extra bolstering and repair work. Once all that was done, Barbara arranged them into the gingerbread village…which the children didn’t get to see until they got to the dining hall for supper that night.

At 8:00, we started the party…the children had special skits and things planned, Jane and Barbara did a little act, and it was open mic night with children reciting poetry. At 10:00, Sergei became our DJ for the disco…and we danced until nearly midnight. A few minutes before, though, we all gathered in a circle and prayed for the upcoming year and thanked God for the good things from last year. After that, it was outside for sparklers!

We all agreed that it was the best New Year’s Eve party, and overall a REALLY great way to ring in the new year. New Year’s day was a low key one for all of us…we ate and watched a movie…and had homemade wings. Nika even took part in that when she sneaked many licks of the container used for mixing the hot sauce. She followed up that performance with about 2 gallons of water. They were really good wings.

We hope all of you enjoyed time with family and friends this holiday season. May this new year bring the promise of hope and joy to each of you and yours.

You can check out our pictures from all the festivities by clicking on our photo albums:

Gingerbread House

New Year’s Eve Festivities

 

Operation Gingerbread House

And…we’re back. We really haven’t gone anywhere, but we haven’t had much time for posting with all the holiday events. More on Christmas later. Gingerbread houses are the things on everyone’s mind at this point.

The tradition was started about 5 years ago of letting the children make gingerbread houses on New Year’s Eve. We got to participate last year by bringing the powdered sugar (for the mortar) and LOTS of candy for decoration. It was fun to see everyone use their creativity to make beautiful houses. After they were done, we created a gingerbread village which stayed in the dining hall. Of course, between New Year’s and Christmas, the houses were more sparsely decorated…everything is edible.

Since New Year’s Eve is tomorrow, Barbara and I launched into making the building materials yesterday. Allegedly, 1 batch makes 5 houses. We needed parts for 30. Doing the math, 6 batches would work, right? (I think you know where this is going…). While I was in the kitchen mixing the dough, Al and Barbara set up the assemby line in the dining room to divide the candy. Each child gets his/her own bag for decorating (and what’s not on the house goes with them to be eaten later).

And here was my mixing station. With all the ingredients…

Note the industrial-sized can of Crisco…I used half over 8, count ‘em…8, batches.

Once the dough cooled long enough, we started cutting out the pieces. That’s when we realized (mind you it was about 10:00 p.m.) that we needed more dough…We’ll still be cutting out pieces tonight.

We did break for supper in the dining hall. Fedya came out to meet us and smelled the gingerbread house smell on me and in my hair…”Cookie? COOKIE!!! My cookie!” Which says to me I will have a junior cookie monster in my house, bringing the total to 2.5 (I have been known to enjoy cookies, too…just not as often).

The decorating will begin tomorrow. I’m sooo looking forward to it for several reasons. These children have sooooo much creativity and it’s always fun to see how they transform brown squares and pieces of candy into a beautiful house. And there are a number of new children here who have never made a gingerbread house. I can’t wait to see their faces when they realize what this project involves. Fear not, the event will be documented pictorally…and shared with you all.

And since it’s such a tradition here, and the kids love it so much, we are planning to keep it going next New Year’s Eve at our house. Make your reservations now. In the mean time, maybe we can get some Christmas pictures uploaded.

And last, but not least, we have 2 more Americans in the house. Janna and her son Zach are here from VA Beach. Well…long story, but Janna arrived last night and Zach should be landing any time. They were supposed to get here yesterday morning at 10:00. But they are here. And we are all headed to the National Opera to see The Nutcracker ballet. How cool is that?

 

When The Ice Melts

So, Fedya, Mary and I are on a plane headed back to the States.  We are so excited about spending Christmas at home with all our family and…oh wait, that was plan A.  Since we’re now at Plan TripleZ Alpha Charlie, I look back with fond memories at the blind optimism we all had.  Don’t get me wrong people, there is no sarcasm or regret in my words (although I hope I got a few of you to bug your eyes out when I said we were coming home ).

At the beginning, when the process was delayed by two weeks, the weather seemed to mimic our mood.  We went from cheerful optimism (50 degrees and sunshine) to fortified indifference (-3 degrees, snow, ice, wind, sleet…basically any time you really have to leave Chicago O’Hare in the middle of winter).

After being battered for two weeks of this weather, we’ve finally seen glimmers of sunshine and blue skies while the temperature has started to move above freezing.  Likewise, the adoption has slowly and steadily started unraveling itself into place.  We have our court date (TOMORROW!!!) and we’re only waiting on one document from the adoption department (literally waiting…our coordinator is taking the WHOLE day to sit in the adoption department to make sure they get it done).  Once the court date is done, there is little red tape left to cut to get home (birth certificate, passport, and US Visa it’s everywhere you want to be).  On the time line, it puts Mary back in the States on the 5th and Fedya and mein on the 17th.

I didn’t notice that the weather was changing until I looked down and saw the ice and snow (which made my walks prime material for America’s Funniest Home Videos) turning to slush under my boot.  It’s then when I realized, “it’s a little bit warmer.”  I was astonished to see the sky when I broke off the malaise of keeping balanced.  It was a revelation (the good kind…not the lakes of fire and dragons kind) to get outside of my daily routine and see the change happening around me.

Being outside of my routine allowed me to also see the change happening around this adoption.  In the beginning, I had high expectations that we would leave today and be home in time for Christmas.  When the process began to drag out, I kept focused on trying to get to this goal of leaving “on time”.  ”If only <fill in the blank> would do <fill in the blank> then we could still leave on the 23rd!” was a mantra I think Galya, Jane, Barbara, and Mary got tired of hearing from me.

A week and a half ago, I called Delta to move our flights up and threw away my rote response.  Throughout that time, I rolled with the punches and followed where the adoption process was going to take me.  Slowly but steadily each part has played out and we’ve navigated them successfully.

Still, I couldn’t see how much progress we were making because I was too focused on the next part of the process.  It wasn’t until I could stop and get out of the routine that I could appreciate what was already finished.  It wasn’t until Fedya looked up at Mary and I and said, “Dad?  Mom?” that beyond expectations, artificial time lines, and the drudgery of the process, we were already becoming the family we set out to be almost a year ago.

So, I am not upset about not being able to leave today.  I’m not even frustrated by the process or the waiting.  The weather is changing for the better.  Slowly but surely, the ground is beginning to warm, the clouds are breaking up, and the ice is melting.

 

Place Your Bets!

Priviyet!

Al’s back in the writer’s chair and it’’s been a week of silence.  We’ve been very busy this week going back and forth from the regional office to the adoption department to the lawyer to the…you get the point.  Aside from a bad case of “elbow face” from the bus transportation, we are intact and healthy.

To summarize a long and exhausting week, we recieved the permission from the region to seek a court date.  This, as all new aspects of this adoption, provided it’s own set of complications.  We now have enlisted the “assistance” of a comrade advocate (aka rat, weasle, shark, lawyer).  No offense lawyers but you know there are those among you who would be better suited selling used Fiats than looking out for the interests of legal clients.  No offense used car salesmen but you know there are those among you that…LOOK, I’M WORKING OFF A STEREOTYPE HERE!!!  Take your PC pants off and finish reading the post! 

Anyhoo, because a misplaced comma on our court hearing request can cost us two weeks, we paid for this lawyer to create our request and submit it for us.  This, of course, took several trips throughout the week to get all of the necessary documents and pay him for his “precious time”.  (can you feel the sarcasm dripping from my finger tips?)  As of yesterday, thanks to the quick feet and maneuvering of our coordinator (SHE ROCKS!), we have a formally submitted request for a court hearing.  All indications place our court date on Wednesday next week (24th…you know, the day after we were hoping to be done with all this and flying back to the States…sigh).

Seeing as how we’re flying (more) blind than we have, we made the executive decision for Mary to fly back on the 5th and Fedya and I follow up on the 17th (if all goes according to our new time table…get the title of the post now?).  .:Side Note:.  Delta, whatever  you think of them, has been the easiest and best official part of this process.  Their international adoption fare was more than reasonable and has no penalty for changing the flight.  I will endorse Delta at every opportunity I get and tell every adoption forum that it is the BEST and ONLY way you should take care of your travel. .:End Side Note:.

SOOOOOO….we’re spending Christmas and New Year’s (and I will spend Orthodox Christmas) abroad.  At least we’ll have a Butterball turkey from the Embassy again (thank you US Embassy).

As of right now, we’re in a holding pattern.  Our coordinator went home (7 hour train ride from Kiev) to spend the weekend with her family and we’re waiting until Monday for our invitation.  In the meantime, I’m doing some light handyman work, website work (yes Christina, I didn’t forget you), and reading a Clive Cussler book (go Dirk Pitt!).  Mary is working on her thesis and helping Barbara replace all the Christmas cookies I’m stealing…oops…

Much love to all of you and your emails and comments.  Pray, pray, pray for us (also that I don’t learn the word jackleg or horseface in Ukrainian).  It is frustrating and angering to work with this system and we need all the patience and understanding from on high.

Till next time…good morning and good luck!

 

Tomorrow…Tomorrow…Tomorrow…TODAY!!!

Today. We got our referral TODAY!!! Which means now, we can get our court date.

Our day started with a trip to the regional office, along with Fedya. One of the caseworkers asked Fedya some questions…about himself and school and what he thought about all this. He did a great job answering the questions, and then he wrote a letter to say that he agreed with the adoption.

After that, we stopped off for a haircut for Fedya. He missed out on the haircuts at The Ark yesterday, but he desperately needed one…so, we found a barber, and Al, Fedya and Halya went in. They did a great job with Fedya’s hair, and he was happy with it, too.

Jane dropped us at the metro so we could head back into town to drop off paperwork at the Dept of Adoption…but it was lunchtime, so another trip to a different Zyplata Hata (this time with actual toilets) and still great food. We took the paperwork over and found out that we would get our referral at 5:00. It was something like 2:30, so we walked around a bit and then headed back to the office to wait. Better to do that and get our referral sooner…since you basically line up for it. Al and I took a nap on the couch…and we are convinced half of Spain was in the office with us. There are a number of Spaniards trying to adopt from here…and if it’s not Spaniards, it’s Italians. Who knew?

But at 5:00, we got our referral and headed to a notary to take care of some other paperwork. After that, it was back to the house, where dinner was waiting. And since I’m done with school for the semester, I can actually update the blog and hang out with everyone tonight!

It was a good day.